sleepless

sigh..
i really don't know how long should this be going on until.
i don't know what to do..
i hate being sleepless..

will i be sleepless longer than last time?

i thought everything evaporated already,
why are they still there?

i tot i've changed to be more mature and stronger,
have i even changed much?

i thought i've fixed the bumpy roads from tripping me down
why did i fell again?

what should i do??

sleeping pills?? LOL..
maybe i should took 1000 sleeping pills
make sure i won't survive like my korean friend..
she took A LOT but yet she survived and having liver problems
maybe i should make sure to chop off my liver n sell it in organ markets..
so it's positive for 0% second life..

chill.. i'm not really thinking bout suicide.. it's juz a joke
but i might need that joke one day..
maybe after i keep on repeating my life this way till when i'm 30.

y should history repeats?
i wonder who curse me till this bad..
i wonder what i did in my previous life..